Creative For Ransom

Hey y’all and welcome to my first set of Hot Takes! I am not a licensed anything, but I have experienced a lot of life and I feel like I’m a relatively sound person. SO, I have some thoughts on mental health generalizations that I see in the media and in real life. LET’S GET INTO IT!!

1. Healing Is Different for Everyone.

I feel like a lot of the time, people have this 1 dimensional perception of healing. They think, “This doesn’t bother me anymore, so I’m healed.” or “I won’t be healed until I can face this person or face this problem head on.” While that may be what healing looks like for some people, that’s not the case for everyone. Sometimes healing is acceptance. Sometimes healing is letting go. Sometimes healing is remembering. Sometimes healing is setting boundaries. People often judge others who haven’t “gotten over” a situation as not having healed, but I don’t think that’s right. People have every right to feel how they feel for however long they feel it.

Whether you went through a traumatic experience or something wrong was done to you, it doesn’t matter. No one else can dictate how you overcome a situation. Healing is a personal experience and others opinions shouldn’t hold any weight.

2. Sometimes, No One Is The Problem

Often times in conflict, people on both sides try to find out who was more wrong or who is at fault. Sometimes there just isn’t anyone to blame. It’s easier a lot of the time to get over a conflict when you have a scapegoat to blame and push the responsibility of wrongness on. It’s a lot harder to accept a conflict where there was no wrongdoer and two sides have to just not meet eye to eye on an issue. People grow and change in different ways and at different times. Sometimes people value different things. That doesn’t mean that anyone is wrong.

I think it’s ok to simply accept that people have differences that can be categorized with “wrong” or “right”.

3. It’s OK To Not Like Someone/thing

This is kind of related to number 1 about healing. From what I’ve seen, lots of people are obsessed with being “nice” or “right” or “the bigger person”. I think all of that is a little stupid. It is perfectly normal and ok in my opinion to not like someone. That doesn’t make you a hater or mean or anything like that. If someone has done something to you that you don’t like or they behave in a way that you don’t agree with morally or otherwise, then that is you’re business whether you like them or not. Liking everyone or being liked by everyone is unrealistic and unhealthy. People are different and if I felt the same about everyone I’d be concerned.

I feel like there is this phenomena of attempting to make people out to be miserable if they aren’t smiles all the time to everyone and everything. I don’t think that reflects real life. Me personally, I have a lot of people and things I dislike. It doesn’t mean I’m unhappy or upset or those things life rent free in my head. It just means that I have boundaries, morals and virtues that I choose to stand by.

4. Time Doesn’t Heal All Wounds

This one may not be a hot take, but I still think it’s true. Lots of people like to give the advice of just let time pass and things will all get better, but I don’t really think that’s a one size fits all remedy. Maybe for a broken bone or a failed interview sure, but in other instances all time does is pass. Whether it be losing a loved one ending a friendship or coming to terms with a healthcare issue, sometimes you just have to learnt o live with things.

People can get used to circumstances, feelings or situations over time and still feel like it just happened yesterday. That’s ok. I don’t want people to think that life is all about overcoming something bad to get to a source of happiness. Sometimes the greatest joys are found in allowing yourself to be in the moment and making the best of it.

5. Not Communicating is Communicating

I’ll keep this lat one short. Not speaking to someone is communicating. You don’t owe anyone your time or energy. If you don’t want to speak with them then don’t. Talking to someone doesn’t mean anything is being solved or made better. Boundaries exist for a reason and you shouldn’t have to rework yourself for the sake of seemingly being a “good communicator”.

Just like a picture is worth a 1000 words, Silence speaks volumes.

Dr. Treasure signing out!!!!! (ooh, I like the sound of Doctor Treasure, lol!)

BYE!